The kind of love that no one talks about
I’ve been wanting to make a Valentine post, but I had that whole “I should study instead of blog!” guilt going on this past week due to presentations, exams and practicals. Of course… I ended up wasting time on the internet ANYWAY, but that’s beside the point.
First of all, I just want to say that I enjoy Valentine’s Day despite being single for practically every V-Day of my life. It’s freaking delicious, and I have this great affinity for things with hearts on them. When things have hearts on them, my chances of buying them increase by 30%. I also love greeting cards and baking themed cupcakes.
See? I bought the Funfetti sprinkles because there were hearts in them.
Anyway, the reason why I’m not bitter is because I’m blessed enough to say that I’m not missing any love in my life. My Lezzie is always here for me, as are my other few, but true friends. Admitting that I need help or admitting that I’m unhappy are things that I can only do with these people. Finding people who won’t let you down or hurt you when you’re vulnerable is quite a feat, and I don’t take that for granted.
Even though I complain about that wall between my mom and me, she still loves me unconditionally as her daughter. She may criticize me, pass judgment on things she doesn’t understand, and expect conservative and society-sound things from me, but she does it out of love. She and Ba want what’s best for me. They might not always express it in the best way, but the intention is there. Some of the greatest rewards during the past few years of my life were the surprises with them - when we find out that we have a common principle or when we simply get along noticeably better as compared to ten years ago.
How do I even begin with the greatest love - my relationship with God? Someone who loves me even more unconditionally, and shines light in times of darkness? My life has been so much richer with goodness after getting more involved in the music ministry. I’ve been taking the readings to heart, relating them to past examples, and incorporating them into my life now.
I don’t feel “single” because I’m not alone. I don’t feel like I’m missing any pieces because my past life experiences have built me into a whole person. I am hopeful that one day I’ll meet someone with whom I can share my life in a more intimate way, but until then… I will continue to appreciate the relationships I have.
And eat a lot of chocolate.
- Acing my pathophys exam!
- Passing my therex written exam & practical (or at least feeling like I did)
- Coffee… what would I do without you?
- Inside jokes w/ketchup
- Good Bible study sessions every week
- Taking a break with the Lord when I want to slam my face into my lecture notes
- Valentine cards from Ma, Sissy, and Little :)
- Getting a heart-shaped box of chocolates from my Lezzie in the mail <3
- Ratatouille visiting Little and always creating a bomb feast
- The kind of love that only changes because it gets better :)
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